I was sitting alone ,holding my aching head , tensions and despairs all around me. It seemed there was no purpose of life ! every thing I did went wrong always , conditions were getting worse day by day. I couldn’t fight more , it was hell tiring , I was tired, tired of running after same thing again and again and still reaching to no end ! so I thought of calling ALLAH ! I said ! I am tired! I am exhausted and worn-out .
ALLAH answers :
لا تقنطوا من رحمة اللہ.
do not despair of the mercy of Allah .az zumur [39:53]
I said no one cares about what is in my heart, ALLAH answers :
ان اللہ یحول بین المرء و قلبه.
And know that Allah intervenes between a man and his heart. Al-anfaal [8:24] I said there is no one mine in this world ! i am alone ! HE replied in Quran:
نحن اقرب من حبل الورید.
and We are closer to him than [his] jugular vein . AL-qaaf [50:16] Then i said , if you are so near to me,how should i contact you ? i got answer in Quran:
So remember Me; I will remember you. Al-baqara [2:152]
Oh ! so now i got, what was the issue. May be i stopped remembering you, thats why you stopped communicating with me too ? ok , now i will try to reconnect to you . but how long it would take ? how long should i wait and tolerate ?
وَمَا يُدْرِيكَ لَعَلَّ السَّاعَةَ تَكُونُ قَرِيبًا.
And what may make you perceive? Perhaps the Hour is near.” Al-Ahzaab [33:63] i said , i am weak and sinful , while you are great and glorious , it would take too long for me to be able to get your attention and mercy. what should i do till that time ? He replied me :
واتبع ما یوحی الیک واصبر حتی یحکم الله.
And follow that which is revealed to you and have patience until Allah decrees . Al- yunus [10:109] i said my Lord ! you are magnificent and your attributes are incomparable. You are imperial and majestic and so is you patience and bounteousness. but my patience can not meet the standards . just give me sign , some thing to pacify my impatience . he responded me through a verse of Quran.
وَعَسَى أَن تُحِبُّواْ شَيْئًا وَهُوَ شَرٌّ لَّكُمْ
But perhaps you hate a thing and it is good for you; and perhaps you love a thing and it is bad for you. Al-baqarah [2:216] I said i do believe in you , and your plans. I trust in you and what ever you have written for me in my fate. but these are my sins ,which fright me and discourage me. And ALLAH’s reply was so soothing ! He replied me :
إِنَّ اللَّهَ بِالنَّاسِ لَرَؤُوفٌ رَّحِيمٌ
Indeed Allah is, to the people, Kind and Merciful. al-Baqara [2:143]
I said i am feeling suffocation. He told me the reason why i feel suffocation.
قُلْ بِفَضْلِ اللّهِ وَبِرَحْمَتِهِ فَبِذَلِكَ فَلْيَفْرَحُواْ.
Say: In the bounty of Allah and in His mercy: therein let them rejoice. It is better than what they hoard.
knowing this, i decided to change. from now onwards i am handing over all my matters to ALLAH. توکلتُ علی الله. i count and rely upon ALLAH and only ALLAH. hearing this , blessings of my Lord embraced me , saying :
ان الله یحب المتوکلین.
Indeed, Allah loves those who rely [upon Him]. finally , i got all answers and solutions of my problems from Quran. ALLAH communicated with me via quran. ALLAH answers, HE speaks , by quran as Quran is word of ALLAH.